Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

It's funny how God works things out for us.

A few weeks ago in our Sunday school class, we were talking about taking risks.  Scott, our teacher, asked what came to our minds when we heard the word "risk."  My immediate answer was, "Reward."  In business you always hear those two words together--without risk, there's no reward. Then we started talking about how comfortable we were with taking risks.  My response?

"Change is baaaad."

I wasn't alone in this feeling. Turns out a lot of people are a little wary of the unknown.  Honestly though, it's not that I really think change is bad. I think it's scary.  I am very hesitant to step out into the unknown.  I tend to be very careful about weighing the pros and cons before I do just about anything.

Kevin, however, is not so hesitant.

And I'm sooo thankful for that.

No. Really.

Not that it hasn't had its scary moments.  Right after Jackson was born, Kevin quit his coaching job.  Without another job lined up.  I spent about three months in panic mode.  It wasn't that he left a perfectly good job--it was far from perfect and it was rarely good--but it was security.  It was income.  It was insurance.

But God provided for us then--a good job that also provided all those things that I needed to feel secure.  It also provided a promise from Kevin to me that he would never quit a job (perfectly good or otherwise) again without something else lined up.  It's a promise he's kept (without problem) for the past five years, and for the past four years he's been in a job that really seems to suit him and that makes me happy.  The one and only drawback was that he was self-employed.  No benefits. 

For almost the entire four years, that wasn't an issue.  As a teacher, I had decent insurance for myself and the kids, and Kevin was able to insure himself through a private HSA.  It wasn't until Annabelle was born that change appeared on the horizon...and this time, shockingly, it was coming from me.

I love teaching. I love my colleagues, my students, and my campus.  But when Annabelle was born, I took 12 weeks off to be a mommy.  During those twelve weeks, I got to attend programs at Jackson and Sadie's pre-school.  I got to really enjoy my kids. One night, jokingly (sort of) I said something to Kevin about not wanting to go back to work.  He stunned me by not completely laughing off the idea.  He actually suggested that I start looking at ways to make that happen.

Geez.  Now I had to start thinking about taking a risk.  It was a huge risk in my mind. The what if's drove me crazy.  Sure, we could get private insurance, but would it be as good as what we had?  It would be super-expensive.  I know lots and lots of people in this world live just fine without insurance, but it's a fear I have.  I can't help it.

I started looking into going part-time at the school.  It isn't done very often, but I thought that the current economic problems of the state might result in some creative staffing.  Unfortunately it didn't work out. With that disappointment, I signed my contract for next year and started trying to prepare my heart and mind.

That's when Kevin came home with another option.  He was looking at an employment website and noticed that there was a job opening for an in-house landman with a local company.  "In-house" was big.  It meant working for one company, and as an employee of that company, he would receive company benefits.  Not more money, just more security.  When he told me about it, he said, "They want someone with five years in-house experience.  I don't have that, obviously, but I applied anyway.  It can't hurt."

Honestly, I didn't think much more about it after our conversation ended. In my mind it was a wonderful opportunity, but it seemed just out of reach.

The next day Kevin called and told me he had an interview.

Really?

Not only did the interview go well, it went extremely well.  The fact that Kevin didn't seem to have the right experience didn't seem to matter.  Suddenly, this pipe dream was looking more and more like a legitimate possibility.

About halfway through this journey came the Sunday school lesson about risk.  I knew God was talking directly to me.  He'd blessed us with this possibility, but it wasn't a given.  It wasn't perfect.  But the one thing I worried about--having good insurance--was taken care of.  It was impossible not to see His hand in it. 

And it took three more weeks, but finally our prayers were answered.  Kevin got the job.

I officially resigned my position at the junior high on Monday.

A very good friend of mine was chosen to replace me today.  I am so happy for her, mainly because I feel like God was answering her prayers too. :)

As I type this, I'm watching Jackson and Sadie build a fort out of blankets and pillows.  Last summer they couldn't build one without my help, but this summer I only have to supervise.  Pretty soon we will make a trip to Walmart and have people give me the "Wow, you've got three little kids" look.  I realize this time isn't going to last much longer. Jackson will start kindergarten next year. 

Time to make this count.